"It doesn’t matter how careful we are ... things will go wrong." - Allana Shewfelt

It feels like it just started, but this summer is already racing to a close. The day camps are ending, the mornings are getting cooler, and I’m getting targeted ads for back-to-school supplies.

While I’m not a parent myself, my Instagram algorithm firmly believes that I am. This means I get to see all the videos of parents carting their little ones around to pick up new pencils, new binders, new backpacks, new clothes, etc. And as they navigate the stores, these parents have big, big smiles plastered on their faces: Back to school is so much fun! 

Is it?

I’ve spent a number of years working with children and their families. Families of all types: The single parent family, the multigenerational family, the closed-off family, the tight-knit family, the refugee family… In these settings, I’m usually hired to help a child who needs lots of support for things like speech, language, or motor skills, or behavioral needs. 

Basically, for several months at a time, I come around a bunch to help families use the advice that's given to them by professionals, like a Psychologist or Speech Pathologist. It’s one thing to know what to do, but it’s another thing to actually be able to do it. So, I come by and help the parents change the household systems.

As silly as it may seem, in this position I would often spend the majority of my time working with everyone except the child I’m hired to help. I’d be supporting and teaching moms, dads, siblings, grandparents, babysitters, bus drivers, and only then finally get to work with the intended child. 

After doing this work, and getting to know so many different people intimately, there are a few things that I think every family should know. (Especially moms!)

There is no perfect family.

There is no family that has everything together.

You are not a failure if your child is struggling.

Other parents could not do this better than you.

Everyone has difficult times.

It’s okay when things go wrong. It happens to everyone at some point.

Especially as we head into fall and back to school, these are important reminders. It doesn’t matter how careful we are, how much we plan, how much we read, how many strategies we come up with, or how much money we spend to ensure a smooth transition- things will go wrong.

Back to school is difficult! 

Don’t let the advertisements fool you, it is not all smiles.

Here are some factors that will impact your transition:

Weather Changes

• “No, you can’t wear your favourite purple shorts. It’s cold in the mornings. It’s been 10 degrees all week.”

• Sike, actually it’s going to be +25 today.

• Nope, wait it’s going to rain- No! Snow!

Traffic Flow & Traffic Pattern Changes

• Why are the highways so crazy today!? 

• More people on the road: City buses, school buses, day care buses, parents, university students…

• Also, the city wants to finish the construction before winter, so they’re doing MORE work, (at the worst time of day!)
  

Routine Changes

• You’ve been eating at 8am, 1pm, and 6pm, but with school your kids are told to eat at 6:30am, 11am, and 6pm. They aren’t hungry that early, so they’re STARVING when they get home.

• Your family was waking up at 8 during the summer, while it was bright! But now it’s getting dark in the mornings, and 6am feels soooooooo early.
  

Financial Changes

• Kids grow, and they need clothes that fit them.

• Kids are growing, and they need accessible snacks to eat throughout the day.

• School, sports, field trips, oh, and new brake pads for the van!

• If possible, look on local Facebook groups for clothing and supply swaps, (you can save a ton this way!)
  

Control Changes

• All summer you’ve been in charge of the schedule, but now you’re at the mercy of the schools!

• Similarly, your kids have been in charge of what they play, when they play, and when they get a break. Now, they have to listen to their teacher all day?! When is it my turn to be the boss?

What Do We Do?

Unfortunately, I don’t have a perfect solution for you. The thing that helps the most will look different for each family. Still, in general, I’ve found that families feel better when they give themselves grace.

Don’t let the stress pile up, and don’t beat yourself up when emotions rise! Try to remember that the first few weeks back will be difficult, but these feelings won’t last forever. It’s okay if you feel like you’re a hot mess- you aren’t alone.

That said, if you start to feel like you’re drowning, and you can’t do it any longer, don't give up. Reach out a hand. You have friends, family, and professionals who want to support you. We are just a text away!

At Sano State Psychology, we are always happy to help.  Get in touch with us HERE or by calling 587-333-6349. 💙

Disclaimer

Our content is for informational and educational purposes and is not a replacement for professional advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you're facing mental health concerns, please seek help from a qualified professional for personalized guidance. Every individual's situation is unique, so use the information here at your discretion. While we strive for accuracy, the field of psychology is ever-evolving, and our content may not always reflect the latest research. Please prioritize your privacy by avoiding sharing personal information in comments or interactions. Your well-being is our top concern, so use our content for educational purposes, but remember to rely on professionals for your specific needs.